دوره Writing in the Sciences ، فصل 3 : strong paragraphs

درباره‌ی این فصل:

Unit 3 reviews how to vary sentence structure and write strong paragraphs. You will practice using the dash, colon, semi-colon, and parentheses, as well as writing well-organized and concise paragraphs.

این شامل 8 زیر است:

This sentence says, but what really grabbed me about the film is that it shows how humans---through our ingenuity, our commitment to fact and reason, and ultimately our faith in each other---can science the heck out of just about any problem. It says, but my fellow Americans, whatever mix of motives led us to create an Electoral College majority for Donald Trump to become President -- and overlook his lack of preparation, His record of indecent personal behaviour, his madcap midnight tweeting, his casual lying about issues like millions of voters casting illegal votes in this election, the purveying of fake news by his national security advisor, his willingness to appoint Appoint climate change deniers without even getting a single briefing from the world's greatest climate scientists in the government he'll soon lead, and his cavalier dismissal of the CIA's concussions about Russian hacking of our election, have no doubt about one thing, we as a country have just done something incredibly reckless. But in an infamous error, the ball rolls through Bill Buckner's legs, they don't make the out, the Mets score three runs to win game six of the World Series.

But that application of clinical epidemiology, that was somewhat wordy, so I think we could even cut that out and just say, evidence-based medicine teaches clinicians how to find, how to assess, and how to decide. So this one reads, finally, the lessons of clinical epidemiology are not meant to be limited to academic physician-epidemiologists, who sometimes have more interest in analyzing data than caring for patients. What if we just said the lessons are not limited to, get rid of the meant to be, to academic physician-epidemiologists, who sometimes have more interest in analyzing data than caring for patients.

To make them all match, we could turn them all into gerunds; that is, words ending in "I-N-G." So you could say "This research follows four distinct phases- establishing, measuring, developing and disseminating. This one reads "Bates describes the five principles for the success of decision support systems in clinical settings- speed, real-time delivery, integration into workflow, simplicity and to avoid data entry. So you could say "Bates describes the five principles- speed, real time delivery, integration into workflow, simplicity and the avoidance of data entry.

They end up with these long paragraphs that are extremely hard to read, because they meander through so many different ideas without a clear focus. Many scientists reach for transition words as a crutch to make up for the fact that their underlying logic is faulty. This comes from President Obama's editorial essay in Wired magazine that I mentioned in an earlier module.

The authors are writing about this in a limitation section of their menu script, they're basically just trying to answer the question, were the perfume concentrations in the experiment appropriate? I'm going to change this and say, make it a little bit shorter by saying, classic epidemiologists pose a question about the etiology of a disease in a population of people. That'd be remain parallel with the first sentence, clinical epidemiologists pose a question about the prognosis of a disease in a population of patients.

Second sentence says, "It seems almost counterintuitive to suggest an energy dense food that is high in sugar and often seen as a treat or a dietary sin could offer such promise." Third sentence says, "However, a large volume of mechanistic and animal model studies has been undertaken demonstrating the potential benefits of cocoa and chocolate for both glucose regulation and modification of complications associated with diabetes." Finally we get, however, the hypothesis of chocolate having a beneficial effect remains counterintuitive to the average consumer and has yet to gain support among the wider medical and health care community.

In fact when people try too hard to avoid repeating a word, that can lead to some amusing sentences, as I'm going to show you in a minute. I see this all the time with my students they change the keywords through out the manuscript, because they are worried about repeating themselves but this leads to all through trouble. And I think scientists start to feel this angst about the fact that they're repeating this keyword so much, so they decide to make up an acronym instead.

So they show in movies that they effectively guided the direction followed by the new lamellopodium, the first reported control of cell movement in real time using light sensitive proteins. So that is the scientists, Levskaya Et Al added a membrane localization, rather than part, I kind of prefer the word domain to the phytochrome and attached the signaling protein to the PIF. The first experiment showed that membrane recruitment of a small part of intersectin transiently increased local protein activity, and that this effect disappeared a few seconds, you need an a there.

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