6بخش

No…

Squidward!

Go away!

Patrick and I were, um, talking to one of the counselors and guess what?

There was a big mistake and you actually won the Campy Award!

That’s right.

Yup.

I… I did?

In a landslide.

Hmm.

So weird they would’ve miscounted like that.

But I guess it’s possible.

Yay!

Nice work, Squidward.

No one deserves it more.

Wow.

And don’t ever stop playing this.

My clarinet.

Look at me.

I really did it!

Yay!

Which is why, even though I can’t stand SpongeBob…but at the same time, well…

I love him.

I love him and I hate him.

Oh.

He’s like ice cream with salt on it, because he’s sweet and super annoying.

He’s nice and nails-on-chalkboard annoying!

Okay, fine, he’s mostly super freaking annoying.

But, this little nattering noodge… is my friend.

And he doesn’t deserve to die.

I’ll be saying my piece now, if it be pleasing the court.

I suppose I could stand up here and tell you how SpongeBob changed me life.

But, I won’t.

I might even speak about how he inspired me when I was just a small-time vendor with a broken-down luncheonette.

But I won’t.

Heck, I’d probably mention how he encouraged me to start up me own restaurant.

You should open up your own restaurant, someday.

The Krusty Krab, made famous by me delicious Krabby Patties!

Two-for-one Wednesdays, by the way.

Pass these around.

But, I won’t.

Nay, you’ll hear none such praise from me.

Because it wouldn’t do him full justice.

It wouldn’t begin to describe the size of the lad’s heart.

Which is huge.

And he puts that heart into everything he does.

The cooking…

Order up!

…cleaning……serving up the delicious Krabby Patties.

But that’s the funny thing.

I used to think me secret Krabby Patty formula was also the secret to me success.

We serve breakfast till 11, by the way, 12 on weekends.

It wasn’t until SpongeBob came to work for me that I realized the formula is more than just a list of ingredients and flavor-capturing methods.

It’s more than a jealously guarded recipe.

The real secret formula is sitting right here.

SpongeBob SquarePants.

Aww…

Get ready.

Ahem!

Maestro?

♪ A formula is something Like a recipe ♪

♪ A recipe is something Like a plan ♪

♪ With elements and measurements ♪

♪ All mixed together by a steady hand ♪

♪ But careful you must be Or you’ll be sad you see ♪

♪ If somehow in the mix It has no soul ♪

♪ So what’s the one ingredient That turns this awesome sauce To liquid gold?♪

I’ll tell ya!

♪ The secret to the formula Is you, you ♪

♪ You, you ♪

♪ The honey in my tea, you know

Is you, you , You, you ♪

♪ The bubbles in the boil ♪

♪ The one essential oil

It’s true ♪

♪ The secret to the formula Is you, you ♪

SpongeBob!

♪ You, you ♪

♪ What in the wide watery world ♪

♪ Would it be like without you?♪

♪ The secret to the formula

Is you, you You, you ♪

♪ The honey in my tea, you know Is you, you ♪

♪ You, you ♪

♪ The bubbles in the boil ♪

♪ The one essential oil

It’s true ♪

♪ The secret to the formula Is you, you ♪

SpongeBob!

♪ You, you ♪

♪ The secret to the formula ♪

♪ Is you, you ♪

So entertaining!

♪ The secret to the formula Is you, you ♪

♪ You, you ♪

Yeehaw!

Ha!

Hilarious!

Hmm?

My snail!

Wha.

Huh?

Halt!

It’s a trick!

Seize them!

Gary, you’re with me now.

I’ll never let anyone take you again.

Faster!

Oh!

Wow.

Yah!

Patrick, what are you doing?

Free food!

Get him!

Come on, come on.

In here!

Stop right there!

Inside!

Quick!

Come on!

Uh-oh.

Push!

Push, Plankton!

You got to be kidding me!

Hah!

Hmm?

Peekaboo!

Attack!

Ha-hah!

Attack!

Whoa!

Watch your left flank, people!

Thrust!

Now parry!

Now pirouette.

Turn around.

Pivot!

Pull harder.

Faster!

To the right!

Hi-ya!

Whoa, whoa!

Do you think we should’ve stayed in there with Squidward?

Nah, he’s got it.

Where is everybody?

Charge!

Whoa!

Squidward!

Squidward!

Fall this way!

No, this way!

Oh.

Man down.

Good catch.

Hey, there they are!

Get them!

Yo, what’s up?

Otto!

I have a gambling problem.

Otto!

Could anyone lend me some money?

To Bikini Bottom!

And step on it!

Stepping on it.

You’re all fired.

To the valet!

Ah!

Leaving so soon, kids?

Hang on, Gary.

I won’t let you go.

Tsk, tsk.

Rather impolite, don’t you think?

It was all their idea, sire.

And I…

…loved it!

Wait, so you’re not mad at us?

No!

It’s been a while since I’ve enjoyed such toe-tapping entertainment.

All is forgiven!

And all charges are dropped.

Hooray!

On one condition.

SpongeBob will return my snail to me without any more shilly-shally.

Wait, what?

Just hand over the snail and you can all go free.

But… I… I…

SpongeBob.

Sage?

Is that you?

Hello.

Sage!

Hi!

Remember…

The courage you seek is inside you.

And it will come to you in your hour of need.

The courage is inside me.

The courage is inside me!

Mr. Poseidon, no.

I’m sorry, but I won’t do it.

What?

I love Gary too much, and he loves me.

If we didn’t have each other, we’d be so sad.

Well…

It wouldn’t really matter what you’d do to us.

And look.

Today, thanks to these amazing friends, my heart feels twice as big a s it ever did.

Especially after what they risked for me:

Flouting the law and defying the mighty king of the sea.

Defying?

Really?

I wouldn’t say defying the king.

Humiliating you in front of your subjects.

Do go on.

More like admiring.

And totally agreeing with!

I just came to see Kelpy G.

And they did it all for me.

I’m sure you’d understand if you had friends like these.

Friends like these?

Wait, what?

Friends like these?

Of course I have friends like these.

I have all kinds of friends!

I have buddies, I have besties.

I have home-slices, palsy-walsies.

It’s infinite!

Chancellor!

Give us an exact number.

The friend count, if you will.

Uh, okay, according to your latest polling data,

we should get more polling data.

What?

Give me that.

Huh?

What about my adoring fans?

Nope.

My elite palace guards?

Mm-mm.

What about my personal trainer?

Mmm… Mm-mm.

My therapist?

Nada.

My tattoo artist?

Uh…nope.

My tattoo removal artist?

No dice.

B-But surely you, my chancellor, my loyal faithful…?

Sorry.

Apollo, take me now.

I don’t have any friends!

Well, you got one now!

Really?

Who is it?

It’s me!

I’ll be your friend.

Do you mean it?

Yes.

But friends don’t kidnap friends’ pet snails.

But I need that snail.

Look, I have a horrible, disgusting wrinkle.

Jumping jellyfish, it’s the size of the Mariana Trench!

Looks don’t matter.

We don’t care about little imperfections.

Or even big ones!

Just look at Squidward.

What’s that supposed to mean?

What’s important is what’s inside.

And I’m sure you can be a fair and kind king to all the creatures of the sea.

I know you’ve got it in you, sir.

If you’d just let your hair down a little.

Huh?

My hair?

Wait a minute.

Are you suggesting that I don’t need this gorgeous mane of wavy locks?

That I don’t require this neck clip?

Be gone, perfect shiny teeth!

This is so freeing!

To heck with this chest plate and girdle.

Oh, wow.

Too far?

No!

Not at all!

No, you look great!

Oh, thank you!

I find this so exhilarating.

So… age appropriate.

SpongeBob, few possess the courage to stand up to a powerful king.

You, sir, are among those few.

I salute you.

Nailed it, SpongeBob.

Sage out.