University Subjects - Part 1دوره: Mastering ielts writing task 2 band 9 model answers / فصل: Discussion & Opinion Essays / درس 1
University Subjects - Part 1
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Welcome back everybody. Let’s dive right into this essay. The usual process will apply here. We’re going to read out the question we’re going to identify the question type. We’re going to find the key words underline those key words and then we’re going to write a plan together before we begin responding to this task. So let’s have a look at the task. Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future such as those related to science and technology discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Now there should be no ambiguity here regarding what type of question this is. As long as you’ve seen the lecture on the question types Hopefully you already saying to me that this is a discussion opinion question and you would be absolutely right. So let’s just write that down. First off we’re looking at a discussion opinion. I say here. OK now let’s consider what the key words might be. There’s quite a few words in this task and that usually means there are quite a few different task elements so it’s very important in a task like this to make sure we address them all. And I got a greater chance of addressing all of those task requirements task elements if we highlight or underline the keywords. So what do we think they are. Personally I will always underline any words like all because they really they they can not always but they often can change the meaning behind a sentence. There’s a big difference between all and some so all. I like that. Certainly University students were not dealing with the primary school secondary school. Looking at a higher education. University students should study whatever they like so we can highlight all of that there. Don’t worry a lot. You know these are pools and parts. Others believed that they should only. Again I would bet that they’re the ONLY be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future. I would also highlighted the examples that they offer science and technology just to give myself an idea of the examples that I could use when responding to this task. We don’t really need to highlight anything below. We understand that discuss both these views and give your opinion hopefully you know that this is such a common question that comes up. Hopefully you know the structure for responding to a task like this. If you don’t that’s OK we’re going to look at it together in a moment anyway. So there are key words. I think that’s pretty much all we need to write there. So let’s consider how we might plan this essay. As I mentioned the structure of a discussion opinion task essay. Hopefully you already know it. But if you don’t pay attention now because this is going to be very important. As always we just want to plan the body paragraphs but the paragraph one paragraph to before we begin planning the exact contents of the paragraphs we need to come up with a separate theme or central topic for each paragraph. That’s an important element of scoring a 7 or above incoherence and cohesion. So the first body paragraph is going to be composed of the side that you disagree with because this is a discussion opinion to ask. You do need to look at both points of view. You are asked to discuss both points of view but it makes a little bit more sense and it’s a little bit more common particularly in academic assignments in essays to start with the side that you disagree with. Start by discussing the side that you disagree with because it leads more naturally on to the side that you agree with because in the second paragraph when we look at the side that we agree with we can sort of address the arguments made previously. It also more naturally leads into the conclusion as well. So that’s why it’s a better order doesn’t matter too much if you change the order. But I really do feel that starting with the side you disagree with is better. My view my opinion is that it is better for students to be allowed to choose whatever they want to study. So I agree with the first few the former view. I disagree more with the latter view. The second view. So we’re going to look at the latter view first because it’s the side that I disagree with. That is about useful subjects. I’m just going to title that paragraph plan useful subjects and the second one is going to. Whatever. Whatever. Hopefully you won’t just use an expression like that in the paragraph. But of course it’s just for our purposes. Remember when you’re writing your plan definitely don’t over think your plans don’t over think. The vocabulary is meant to be quick snappy sharp. You don’t want to spend too much time on it but it is good to have a clear central topic for each paragraph. Now you can get into the business of creating a paragraph now. One way to do today is I’m going to already set out the structure that I want to use. I can modify it if I need to but this is such a dependable structure we can use in so many cases. Topic sentence support sentence example sentence alternative sentence and result sentence. So let’s see if we can create some points here. Topic. So first of all why do people think that students should only be allowed to study subjects that will offer useful jobs in the future. For me the argument here is that jobs that are possible after studying these fields usually allow society to progress a little bit more particularly from a practical point of view. So society those key words there were just the noun society and the verb progress. Think about how I’m going to put it later. It’s not going to be a complicated sentence. I usually think it’s bit better if you have a relatively simple first sentence just so you really clearly communicate your first argument why is it so important that universities provide us with these people that allow society progress to progress. I think a good way of looking at it is to imagine what would happen if they weren’t there and if they weren’t there then we probably wouldn’t have the means to enjoy modern life. So I say no luxuries of modern life maybe even luxuries is going to fart’s the basics of modern life. You may argue as well so we might just put that aside when I get there. So without these trained professionals who wouldn’t have we wouldn’t get to enjoy our what we take for granted in modern life that lends itself really nicely to an example. Really natural progression really natural transition into an example here so we can think about you know public transport. We wouldn’t be able to have that if we didn’t have engineers which is kind of related to science and technology. So you know we’ve got public transport called Peetie including things like bridges. Whenever I think of Engineers I always think of bridges for some reason but they’re certainly very important in our modern age. So the alternative end result then we need to look at that conditional. What would happen if we didn’t train these professionals in this way. Well let’s keep it very very simple. If we didn’t train them then they wouldn’t exist. Quite simply and then the reader can infer that they will actually go back to this idea here. What we’re basically doing here is making it much more task specific. So universities don’t train. What would happen is that there would be a shortage of these workers a shortage of these professionals. So that’s what I’m going to write down and to focus on my view. Now so starting with an argument as to why students should be able to study whatever they want. In my view the main reason for this is so that we can actually get this. Yes it’s important that we have these workers but these workers need to be motivated. They need to be passionate. If they’re not motivated if they’re not passionate then they might not do as well of a job. And we actually might end up causing more problems. So if you give students the choice that creates autonomy motivation and passion. So we’re just going to write motivation passion here. That’s our main argument giving them the choice gives them this. Now why why does giving them the choice lead to motivation and passion. It’s because free choice gives people a sense of autonomy autonomy is one of the main ingredients in creating drive and enthusiasm. Just think about you know anything that you personally like anything you personally enjoy if you will made to do it if you are forced to do on a daily basis you’ll love for that thing would probably decrease but if you chose to do it because it was your job that you chose to do you’d likely you’d be more likely to maintain those high levels of enthusiasm. OK I keep going on I think it’s just going to be the result sentence here. This seems to lend itself quite tightly to a result since if we have this drive and Qs Yasm and not only are they going to be more successful but they’re going to take it one step further. They’re going to have the impetus to master their subjects. There’s a difference between success and mastery. They want to reach top level. So therefore you know we’re not just going to get good proficient professionals we’re going to get top professionals really really good professionals. Again we can consider what would happen if we didn’t do this if we force students to take subjects like science and technology. What would happen while the drive would disappear drive would disappear and that may cause problems with our engineering field with our science field. Maybe the discoveries would dry up maybe the constructions would fall down because people just wouldn’t care enough they wouldn’t pay attention enough potentially. And know that’s the argument that I’m putting forward. So let’s leave that there and we can now consider how we might begin our essay with an introduction. OK let’s think about that now. It is out the way but an introduction to make it simple. We’re going to go with it. There is no doubt today. Do be careful whenever you are using. There is no doubt you need to be absolutely certain that you follow it with cannot be doubted. So there is no doubt what would both sides agree with. That’s a good way of thinking about it. You’ve got this disagreement. What would both sides agree with. I think both sides would agree that university is very important. I don’t think anybody is denying that. So let’s fight that in a slightly nicer way. So there is no doubt that universities play a crucial role at this point you might see me write this expression in a number of times. That’s good. I’m only going to write it once in an essay. You need to hang onto expressions like this because they’re very very versatile. So there’s no doubt that universities play a crucial role in the proposition educating society. And then that’s it. You know keep it short and sweet for a for a German statement usually helps quite well. However now the reason I’m using however is because we’re contrasting something that’s agreed on with something that’s disagreed on. So the nice thing here is that we get to say however while so however contrast this sentence with the next one while contrasts the two views that I’m about to put forward. First one being where some believe that this education referring back this education should be a here’s a nice expression you can use good exclusively towards something is geared towards something it has that aim. We often use it with audiences as well it’s geared towards younger people is geared towards this purpose as well as we can use in both those cases where we can say towards subjects that may be of practical use in the future. The key word here is exclusively so it shouldn’t be geared towards anything else. It’s like an only. Only towards subjects that may be of practical use in the future. So a little bit similar to what we’ve got up here. But I’ve said of practical use rather than useful. Now we’ve got to the end of that idea that if you were going to use a comma to create that complex sentence and now we’re going to put forward my point of view and notice that I also by putting forward my point of view and also including other people’s views as well. Like up here I would agree with those who argue I would agree with those who argue that how can I put this forward potentially one’s choice of a view subject. So I’m going to use the term for the subject at university that you take for your qualification to be a degree one’s choice of degree should lie with the student. And we are. I think that’s good enough. I just read that again there is no doubt universities play a crucial role in education in educating society. However some believe that this education should be geared exclusively exclusively towards subjects that may be of practical use in the future I would agree with those who argue that one’s choice of degree should lie with the student. Potentially a little bit wordy 51 words maybe a word more than I would have liked. But you can see this quite a lot of language in this task so sometimes it’s difficult to keep that introduction a bit shorter. Probably could if you were willing to be a bit more concise. But if you’ve got the speed then there’s no problem with having a bit slightly longer introduction. Let’s move into the first paragraph and when focusing initially on the useful subjects because this is a discussion opinion task you can use that on the one hand and on the other hand. But me I’m going to use a fussily And the reason that I’m using Firstly is because this is actually my point of view as well. Notice what I said earlier. I was talking about all of this and I said if you don’t have this then you can have this. So I actually agree that society has to be able to regress. And we need to have the ingredients of progress which is not just qualified professionals but motivated professionals. So I’m actually going to put this forward as my own point of view but it will actually kind of overlap with other people’s points of views so I don’t need to say those who believe argue that in a different essay. If you are completely against what you were writing then you would say those who believe the viewpoint argue that the arguments or people who believe the viewpoint may argue that the argument. OK so to be careful with this. This one is my own view so we can put this forward as a firstly. So firstly it is vital that universities equip our work force. A nice expression whenever you are dealing with university and society in jobs the workforce is a very good word to have in your arsenal with scientists engineers really focusing on that science and technology aspect and other professionals that’s which. Up to you because this is a defining relative clause you can use that or which enable society supergrass. OK so there is no language here saying some people believe those who believe you could actually and it would be OK. But because this is also my own view I think it’s pretty hard to deny this anyway. Then in fact if you added it in it might actually sound a bit strange. So some people believe that universities should equip our workforce with scientists. I think everybody kind of agrees that. So do be careful not to just include that without thinking. So this is my own view as well. We don’t need to include those who believe or many people believe etc.. Ok now why. Why is it important to equip our workforce with such professionals. But this is because of that support sentence. When you look at the S.. I just want you immediately to think this is because this happens because the reason for this is without thinking too much about how you’re going to transition. You want more speed and accuracy. This is because a country without such experts no way. Same professionals would be experts without such experts as a country. And yes there’s repetition here but it’s on purpose. Has this nice symmetry. A country without this is a country without this you know it has a nice sound to it. Is a country without. See that repetition again but on purpose. Without the means so the possibility of or the ability to the means to plan maybe three parts is to create or maintain essential features so this is another way of saying basics but I like the expression essential features of modern life because that’s what’s engineers scientists and a lot do they plan first they create second they maintain third we need to have all of those things. And it’s nice to just chuck in a three part list every now and again this time with verbs OK. We have an example I’m not going to ever think it’s going to jump straight into a for instance for instance. Now what I have here is the possibility to use a conditional. I’m probably going to end up using a few conditionals in this essay. But that’s not a problem at all because conditionals are a good way of showing your grammatical range. There are no easy sentences to get right so I’m going to take advantage of the fact that I can do them. Bring them in. So if we did not have university educated engineers we’re just going to focus on one field of work. Now I think I’ve mentioned it before but when you give examples if you can be very singular in your focus if you can just pick out one particular example. It really strengthens the example because the reader is able to imagine it much more easily in his or her head. So has that strength that visual clarity. So if we did not have university educated engineers we could up here just going to give you a gut feel we something not enjoy such public transport facility as those bridges here but I’m actually going to do this kind of separate search transport. So these are facts and infrastructure because whenever we think of engineers with thinking infrastructure to and infrastructure as subways and that sort of an American so it’s OK to bring this in subways trams we could say. And of course my favorite I think of Engineers bridges OK. And we are back in the sense since I’ve left a little gap here because I want to just test for a moment your conditional grammar. If we have this gap here what word do you think goes in that gap Hopefully you’re already screaming at the screen which would be great and hopefully you’re saying would would because we have a past tense in the because clause. So you got the cause and effect is the cause. If it’s past tense here then we use Word on the other side to create a second conditional and we use the second conditional to suggest something that is unlikely or hypothetical. Now this is definitely hypothetical because we do have university educated engineers. So a second conditional if we were to use the first conditional here it would be wrong. No just my use of the second conditional as I said that really really important to practice your conditionals because they’re so useful within essays both to illustrate and strengthen your points and to demonstrate your grammatical range. So it’s like a superpower for your essay really important. OK. One more sentence here because usually when we’ve got the ADR they can combine together kind of like I was going to do down here. So we just want to work more more so we’re going to write he’s an expression is quite nice. The argument goes now because I’ve written this in I am now separating myself from the viewpoints from what follows in this sentence here we can see this is all my own view because I didn’t write any language that separated myself from the contents. This time I’m going to write that because I do not believe that we would have a shortage of workers if we didn’t force universities to train their students in this way. So I’m going to write the argument goes to this is what the argument is of people who believe this. So the argument goes that if students are allowed choose what they want to study them we’re going to have a negative consequence of that. So people who do not agree with this. This is what they think. The argument goes if students are allowed to choose what they want to study then there will be places that are allowed present. And then over here will be sort of the first conditional will be a shortage of these important workers. So this is a vital piece of the language in this paragraph do not look over it really take it in try to absorb that. It’s very important if you be writing a paragraph and you agree with everything it’s said. But then you want to change direction to the argument that you might not agree with. Then you can use the argument goes helps to separate yourself from that viewpoint from that argument at least.
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