Job Satisfaction - Part 1دوره: Mastering ielts writing task 2 band 9 model answers / فصل: Miscellaneous / 2-Part Essays / درس 1
Job Satisfaction - Part 1
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In this essay we’re going to look at a question type which we’ve arguably already looked at but it’s a little bit or at least on the surface it’s a little bit trickier. It seems to be composed of more complicated elements and some people really struggle when it comes to essays like these and I’m just going to show you how we could respond to it in two different ways and that it’s really up to you which way you choose. But there is an element of flexibility about’s questions like these and that should give you a little bit more confidence when responding to them. So let’s have a look at the question itself which is as most people spend a major part of their adult life at work. Job satisfaction is an important element of individual well-being. What factors contribute to job satisfaction and how realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers. If you were to assign a question type to this question what type of question do you think it would come under. It’s a bit of a tricky one. And it maybe doesn’t seem like it corresponds to any of the questions hypes neatly but it’s to my mind it kind of looks like a situation question you’ve got two questions together. You’re not really looking at pros and cons arguing for or against. So we’re looking more of a situation but I think it can be helpful to maybe give this a different name a different category name we might call this a two part essay but I’ve written situation here because we can if we want to we can use the structure of a situation essay to help us. If you remember back to when we were looking at the problem and solution situation essays we had three sentences about the problem and two sentences about the solution in each party paragraph. We could do the same thing with these two questions here. Three sentences about these two sentences about this for each paragraph. Or we could just basically use a separate paragraph for each question. It depends how related those questions are. And that’s really going to depend on each individual question that you get. But there are two different approaches you could take. Today we’re going to take the approach of separating the questions into each body paragraph but it’s towards the end of the essay I’ll just kind of come back and suggest to you how we could have looked at them in the same bloody paragraph as well. Let’s just talk about the key words here. Before we get into too much detail surrounding that. So what do you think are the key words in this essay here. I would say that the key words are major parts. You want to kind of reference that at least work so you get a life of what people spend a major part of their lives work. And this is the main topic here. Job satisfaction. Everything revolves around in this essay. And we could say important elements of individual well-being as well potentially more importantly with what factors contribute to job satisfaction and how realistic is the expectation of this kind of satisfaction and very very important. A key word at the end here. All workers. So we’re not just saying workers we’re not just saying some workers we’re not just saying one worker we are saying all workers and that can make a big difference to how we respond to the task because this little question at the end here there is an element of an opinion about it. Some people are going to disagree with what you think we may need to bring in some opinion language as well. OK. Right. Well let’s think about a plan. And as usual we don’t want to plan the introduction and we don’t want to plan the conclusion. It’s a bit of a weird looking I say but that doesn’t mean we should change our approach. So we’re going to have BP won and we’re going to have BP too. And then we want to come up with a theme and the nice thing about creating a structure wherein we look at each question in a separate paragraph. The nice thing about this is that we don’t need to over think the themes. The themes are right there in front of us. The first one is going to look at factors and the second one is going to look at how realistic it is to achieve job satisfaction for all workers. We can just jump right into it with factors. That’s a really easy paragraph. The structure is kind of like a list maybe you’re just going to look it to remember it’s much more about the quality than the quantity of ideas they’re looking for factors. Plur. We give them plural we’ll give them to give them a nicely developed ideas rather than looking at lots of ideas which are underdeveloped. So first idea for me is how you value yourself self value. We can call that sir how you perceive yourself kind of linked to things like self-esteem and all this sort of stuff. I’m going to go straight into an example to explain how this can influence a person’s job satisfaction. We can imagine to work as one highly paid one low pay. So one highly paid worker so highly versus low paid worker to do the same jobs. What would be the consequence of that. The consequence would be that the person we should put is here really the person would feel undervalued the low paid workers would feel undervalued and as a result of that the self-esteem would plummet so low self-esteem and that would affect dissatisfaction at work. So you’re making a very clear link to the satisfaction that we should always try to do when you’re writing your body paragraphs make sure you continually look back to what you’ve titled. The theme here is basic factors in job satisfaction. You keep coming back started to otic idea of job satisfaction. Don’t leave it to the reader to link those ideas together. I want you to be as direct as possible in a way try to treat the reader like a bit of a bit of an idiot really. So you’re trying to make those links as clear as possible. Now we could just move on to another factor. So call it the second topic. T is probably not the best letter to use X is not a different topic but whatever really you’re going for another factor another point. OK another factor which influences job satisfaction could be interest personal interest and your passion for the work. So here we could take advantage of the sort of alternative result strategy. If a person does get a lot of money but isn’t interested in work then they’re only going to be happy if they leave work very good be happy when they leave work. So this alternative result ID here is going to be high salary low passion something like that. I know I keep writing low don’t worry I’m sure I can paraphrase it later but I’m not going to overthink it in the plan. That should be fine. And then we could even if we if we find time if we find the space we could even talk about how a worker who does love her job will be happier than somebody who gets paid a lot of money but doesn’t love the job. Something like that we can create a strong sense of contrast. That’s if we find a target and leave that there for now. Let’s move over into the how realistic and we first of all because we’ve got this opinion element here we want to make it clear what we think. Do we think that it is realistic for all workers to expect to be satisfied in their work. A lot of people will say no here but I believe that’s satisfaction can come from the mind rather than from extrinsic factors like your money or you or your manager and all this sort of stuff you can create in yourself so I’m going to say that we could modify or manipulate these elements above manipulate these factors in a way which will allow us to achieve satisfaction. OK. So we can we can reach it if we’re willing to manipulate how we feel about these things. Let’s look at the first one. So here we are coming back and we’re referring to each of those factors. And this is why it can be useful to look at both questions in each body paragraph because now it gets a little bit confusing. But if you’re confident in your ability to keep referencing back to particular points from before if you’re confident you can do that then it’s not really such a problem but it’s question is quite difficult to do that so I don’t you recommend it. But this is how it could be done. So we’re going to look at which to say first factor here so we use an F F to refer to the first factor. If we look at the first factor we’re looking at value. I don’t think the value needs to be a nice expression here. Extrinsically assigned so value can be presumed was an intrinsic rather than extrinsic. In other words we don’t have to feel effects I can use that in other words support sentence clarifying In other words we don’t have to value ourselves based on money. But we can value ourselves based on how we perform at work and that’s within our control. So it’s a value based on performance. That’s the case and we can reach that self-value. And if South self-value influences satisfaction then that means that satisfaction is within our control. Second factor to intervention S.F. here to mean second factor. And that was looking at the passion with passion of course most people don’t really work in jobs that they’re passionate about. Unfortunately that doesn’t mean in my opinion that they don’t have times where they can enjoy some sense of job satisfaction. Let’s think about how if they work hard then they should be able to earn enough money to at least in some sense pursue their passions outside of work. They should be able to have more time to spend on their hobbies more money to spend on their hobbies and that kind of thing that could give them a sense of fulfillment in work. Their sense of purpose. So we’re going to write that here. So first of all most people aren’t in jobs they’re passionate about. So usually not passionate but slack however would be useful here. I’m not really sure how to turn. So I’m actually just going to write however and we’re going to talk about Lauzon to pursue passions outside of work. You know outside work I know what I’m going for. OK. So a little bit of a wordy plan. It’s a little bit of a worthy task. It’s not so easy it’s not such a tidy task. It’s one of the harder ones that we have. So we do have a decent looking plan so we can now leave that over in the corner and we can think about how to open up this essay. And although there’s quite a lot of language here I think again we can get away with just writing two sentences to open it up. Well first of all going to paraphrase what we can see up here and then the next sentence we’ll talk about what the essay is going to do which is answer those two questions that were also giving in an opinion about what we think about this. Our job satisfaction as you can see up here it’s very important. It’s important. So the question is quite important. And when we can see that we can often start with something like it is important to consider Judge strain so that you’ll see that most of my essays open in similar ways. I don’t have a different essay opening for each essay but some of them overlap. You see a couple of expressions being used multiple times. I’d recommend the same thing. Don’t memorize phrases to use every single time but learn how different expressions can be used in a number of different ways. Quite useful. So it’s important to consider. We’ll just go straight into this here because I’m going to go back in a minute which factors what’s in other words contribute influence influence and then you can’t really paraphrase this or I wouldn’t recommend paraphrasing this right now. It’s such a strong collocation that it communicates a single idea. We can paraphrase it later. But this is an instance where I wouldn’t recommend paraphrasing right at the beginning we want to say this is looking at job satisfaction. OK. Is import to consider which in fact it includes job satisfaction as you can see I haven’t really paraphrased this part here but I want to combine it over here. So I want to say why it’s important. Consider which factors influence job satisfaction and we’ll do that by paraphrasing what we have here. We’re going to take that here. We’re going to use the expression considering considering what’s so I can say something considering is quite useful when you want to set up a sentence in this way considering how much time we spend at work. It is important to consider which factors influence job satisfaction that it’s about right to me considering how much time we spend at work. So consider what’s important therefore it’s important to consider something else. You’ve got that double use of consider if you want to you could change consider to take into account the fact that you got to avoid the repetition completely. Even that was for repetition. Take into account which factors influence job satisfaction. OK what’s this I say going to be a nice thing about doing this. Referring to the fact is here because now we can use referencing this essay we’ll explore two of these factors. We know how many we’re going to do. We’ve written it down here. Two of these factors. And then what. And then it’s going to explain how all these factors how they can just say they enabled potentially allow job satisfaction. Again I would recommend paraphrasing that just here to be let’s use an expression within the reach like attainable to be within the reach of and is crucial we want to make that clear of all workers. I say every worker we can say to paraphrase a little bit to be within the reach of every worker. OK we got a word count there of 44. So he kept it under 50. A lot of people struggle with that because he’s such a long task but we’ve managed it there. OK let’s move into the first paragraph. Now when you are writing a paragraph which contains a list maybe it’s advantages maybe it’s disadvantages maybe it’s factors maybe it’s problems whatever it is. A nice way to start. One option you can use is of you say of all of these things but just replace things with whatever you are talking about. So of all the very years we’ve got faxes here we would like to work components some might be quite useful because we talk about components making up something else the make up job satisfaction of all the various components which lead to job satisfaction maybe we could paraphrase here we go quite a lot of job satisfaction now and now because we in the USA we can paraphrase and make sure the reader actually understands what we’re talking about. Let’s go something like happiness or work of all the various components which lead to happiness at work one is and then you add in your idea which in this case is self value. So of all the disadvantages of living abroad one is the language barrier of all the advantages of higher education. One is that it leads to better job prospects. So it’s a nice little structure to start off your paragraph. OK. Now we have an example of a note to start an example please. For instance have talked about it to work as using conditionals I’ve mentioned it before but using conditionals with examples is often very useful and I swear to get things started to work as do the same job we talked about this earlier. But one gets paid more than the other OK. That’s the first clause. So we’re going to come here. The low paid work will feel Avernus up here undervalued. So nice bit of word formation. Prefix under feel under valued. And that sentence that we’re looking at a result is quite a negative result. So instead of as a result we’re going to use as a consequence so consequently in this case or always go with. So this is an interesting thing. Some people struggle with his her. What do I write. I’m not sure Shall I write his slash her he’s flashy what you can do to avoid this is just right there. You can use that to refer to a single subject or object which is unidentified in terms of gender. So we don’t need to use he or she you can use that to refer to a single person without gender. So their self-esteem will plummet go down very quickly and then that leads to that low satisfaction don’t want to use lead. I’ve used it before so let’s use thus and a nice word to use here. Compromising so affecting in a negative way having that influence does compromising their Again their happiness consequently their self-esteem will plummet thus compromising their happiness. Moving on to the second idea here. A second factor is personal passion. I know that I’ve written personally interested but I think I like it more with passion has a strong sound to it. Sounds a little bit better. I do notice that I’ve written a second and not the second. If I wrote the second it would suggest that there is only one second factor which suggests as well that there are only two in a way but there are lots of factors I could have chosen many other factors for this second position. And so when we have one of many different choices we will use an indefinite rather indefinite article OK. Looking at the plan of this alternative result strategy going on here. We want to contrast our high salary with that low passion and saying that often those two can go together. So let’s go with something lie again kind of like another example but we don’t really need to always use the expression for instance. For example I’m just going to go straight into it and employee may be given a high salary. Better expression. He wanted a lucrative salary to showing off your qualifications here. An employee may be a awarded a lucrative salary but if so this is useful so are using moving into that conditional again. If they begin to go out they refer to a single person without gender. If they are not interested in their tasks the interest coming in here would put it over here that they are not interested in the tasks they can be another commer because at the end of that conditional clause if they are they are not interested in their tasks. They will only be satisfied to certainly be satisfied when they actually leave work because then they can enjoy what they enjoy. Now what’s the word count. 125 words so we’re bang on half way. Maybe you would feel that this might be a little bit on the short side maybe 125 words. Of course if we doubled it to 50 but it’s a bit risky isn’t it. So I think we do have that opportunity to have that extra sentence and that I was mentioning before where we contrast it again and because we’re contracting again we can use that expression in contrast. And here we use it defining relative clause a worker who a worker has quite similar an employee and a worker a worker who is paid poorly. Notice how I’ve managed to avoid using low throughout just one instance of a death worker who is played poorly but loves her job. This is the opposite. High salary low passion low salary high passion that loves her job may be happier at work than at home. And again as contrast the routes are when they leave work when they stay or work when they leave home when they stay home. There’s a nice sense of symmetry. So the ending of this paragraph and then if we do check it again we can see maybe now it’s on the longest iBOT least it’s a bit safer 1 4 5. OK. So we can now move swiftly on to the second paragraph.
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