1بخش

This year’s gonna suck.

How do you know that?

Oops.

That happened.

Call it a hunch.

Ew.

Last year, we were kings.

Fifth-graders.

We ruled that school.

This year, nobody likes us.

That is true.

Speak for yourself.

I’ll be fine.

I got a mustache coming in.

I don’t see it.

Nope.

Mmm-mmm.

Nope.

Uh-uh.

No one’s got it worse than me.

See that girl over there?

She’s gonna torture me every chance she gets.

Wait a sec.

Isn’t that your sister?

Yeah.

At least you guys have your own rooms.

My grandfather stole mine.

Wait.

Your grandpa moved in with you guys?

When did that happen?

Ever since he robbed that grocery store.

Can I help you, sir?

You can help me find Maria.

Oh, Maria’s gone.

We’re completely self-checkout now.

Much faster.

Much more efficient.

I think you’ll like it.

So, are the prices gonna be lower because I’m doing all the work now?

We have everyday low prices here, sir.

Every day.

Every day?

Every day.

Get out of my way.

Get out of my way.

Oh, no problem.

Whoa!

Please scan your item.

I’m talking to a robot.

Please scan your item.

I just did.

See if this thing.

Please scan your item.

You’re very boring.

Please scan your item.

Yeah, right.

Sir!

Sir?

Sir, I need you to stop.

Hey!

Whoa!

Oh, hey!

Sir, let me help you.

You hurt my leg!

Get away!

Come on, sir.

Get out of the way!

I’m a senior citizen!

Get out of here!

I know judo.

Leave that poor man alone!

Whoa!

Your pharmacy stinks!

You’re ageist!

Oh, I see.

Y’all want to bring it on.

You want to bring it on?

Treat us with respect!

Oh!

That’s all you got?

Now, that hurt.

Hey, there’s my girl.

You didn’t have to come all this way.

I told you I was fine.

What happened to the mailbox?

Oh, that.

Some idiot took it out.

Oh, crap.

Dad, you’re driving again, aren’t you?

You lost your license, remember?

No, I didn’t lose it.

I forgot to renew it.

So now I have to retake the test again, which is idiotic because I’ve been driving for over 50 years.

I mean, what am I supposed to do, starve to death?

I’m coming in.

This can’t keep happening.

Don’t worry, I’m never going back to that damn store again.

No, I mean the part about, I have to leave the dealership early, drive two hours each way just to check on you.

I didn’t ask you to come!

No, you didn’t!

The police did.

Dad, I want to come.

I want to be there for you.

But maybe this is now the time that we have to consider.

No.

I am not moving.

I built this house, I’m gonna die in this house, and that’s it.

And you’re not putting me in a home.

What if it were our home?

What are you talking about?

Fish and relatives stink after three days.

That’s a horrible idea.

We’ll kill each other.

It ain’t working.

No, sorry.

Dad.

I miss her, too.

And, and that’s not gonna change by moving me out of my house and sticking me in yours.

Oh, God.

Well, maybe we could miss her together.

Yeah, maybe.

But you don’t have the room in your house anyway.

Where would you even put me?

The attic?

No way!

Come on, buddy, don’t make this harder than it already is.

It’s the only choice.

Ooh!

Dad, if it’s the only choice, then it isn’t a choice at all.

‘Cause a choice means you get to pick between at least two things.

And this is one thing.

Unless the other thing is I get to sleep in the yard and get eaten by a bear.

Don’t be so dramatic, Peter.

Besides, your sisters already share a room.

Yeah, well, Sarah told me you said that.

No, I know she exaggerates, but.

Christmastime is here Happiness and cheer.

No, you stop.

Hold on.

Shh!

Shh!

Shh!

Shh!

Shh!

Shh!

Shh!

Shh!

Shh!

Shh!

Shh!

Shh!

Shh!

Shh!

Shh!

Shh!

Shh!

Shh!

Hey, what’s up?

Shh!

Plus, the attic doesn’t have a bathroom.

And Grandpa can’t do all those stairs.

And the basement is the basement.

What?

My Jordans.

I just put in fresh laces.

Hey, Peter.

Do you need help moving upstairs?

Get out!

It’s still my room!

Hmm.

Not for long.

Go away!

Go, go, go.

Look, Peter, I know this is not ideal, but we’re a family,and you have to make sacrifices for each other.

Sometimes very big sacrifices.

Look, sweetheart, the attic is bigger than this room.

Once you move in, then that will be your room.

No, it won’t.

It’ll be the attic, where you put stuff and forget it, just like our old TV, or the exercise bike that Dad used once.

True.

I exercise.

What?

Look, think about it as a fresh new start.

All right?

We’ll dust everything off, put some new paint up everywhere.

Give you a chance to clean out your turtle tank.

Huh?

They like it like that.

Gives them privacy.

Does this still fit you, sweetie?

Yes.

Grandpa!

Grandpa’s here, Grandpa’s here Grandpa all the way

Oh, what fun it is to have a Grandpa come and stay, hey

Hey!

Now, remember, we don’t want to overwhelm Grandpa, okay?

So let’s let him get settled in.

There’ll be plenty of time to talk to him tonight at dinner.

Okay?

Oh, I’m not gonna be here.

What?

What?

I’m studying with Russell.

“Studying” still means studying, right?

It’s not slang for something else?

No, Dad, “studying” still means studying.

And I already cleared it with Mom.

Grandpa!

Jenny!

Don’t body-slam.

Hi, Grandpa.

Hello, sweetheart.

Ed.

Artie.

Where’s your brother?

Peter?

Peter!

Peter?

Kids, let’s help, uh, Grandpa get his bags.

Okay.

I got this.

I got it.

Okay.

It just.

It’s right over here.

You know, he called me Artie again.

Please, Arthur.

This isn’t easy for him.

Hey, Grandpa.

Hey!

There he is!

Look at you.

Look at you.

You’re sprouting up like a weed.

Oh.

Nice sneakers.

Thanks.

How do you like your room?

It looks nice.

Yeah, that’s ‘cause it is nice.

Easily the nicest room in the house.

Well, I know, kid.

Look, I didn’t want it to be this way, either.

Sometimes you have to make sacrifices in a family.

That’s true.

You’re right.

Sometimes you don’t even get a vote.

That makes two of us.

Careful with these floorboards.

They’re not very level.

I’ll remember that.

Thanks, kiddo.

Talk to you later, Grandpa.

Come visit me in the attic anytime.

It’s the creepy place with all the spiders and mice.

Peter!

I wasn’t!

Here we are.

You were robbed, bro.

No.

I was invaded.

The worst part is I’m not even allowed to complain about it.

Seems like you’ve been complaining an awful lot, P.

I mean at home, ‘cause he’s old and we all love him and stuff.

Dude, come on, you can’t allow the enemy to invade your base.

You got to fight back and stick up for your rights.

I don’t have rights.

Everyone has rights.

They’re in, uh.

Uh, alien-something.

They have to allow you to pursue happiness.

It’s in the Constitution.

Yeah.

Well, that would be great if I lived in North America, but it turns out that 153 Burlington Avenue is actually in North Korea.

Whoa!

Did your parents know that when they bought the house?

What?

I wouldn’t put up with this, Petes.

I’d demand my room back, or else it’s war.

What do you mean, “or else it’s war”?

You want him to attack his grandfather?

Sneak attack, Emma.

See, he can’t fight him the normal way, because his grandfather has strength, size and experience, whereas Peter is just weak, small and dumb.

You’re a bad friend.

Hi, Steven.

Mom says don’t forget to wear your sandals when you shower in gym class.

Not cool, Lisa.

My brother has that toe fungus thing.

It’s totally gross.

And contagious.

Contagious?

Gross.

It’s only on six of my toes.

That’s a lot of toe, bro.

When you leave me

My world’s not alive

You’ll be in my days and nights.

Hi, Grandpa.

Hi, sweetheart.

Do you want to play a game?

I have Reindeer Run.

I have Santa’s World.

I have 1-2-3 Christmas Tree.

Well, maybe, but not right now, okay?

Want to watch a movie?

I have Frosty the Snowman.

I don’t think so, okay, sweetheart?

Maybe tomorrow?

Okay.

What’s wrong with Grandpa?

Why?

What happened?

He doesn’t want to do anything.

He just stares out the window, but there’s nothing there except that dead tree that Daddy says he’s gonna cut down.

But you won’t let him use the chain saw.

Daddy can use a chain saw any time he wants, honey.

Okay?

He just chooses to wait until Mommy says it’s okay.

Grandpa will be all right.

He’s just tired and thinking a lot about Grandma.

He’ll be okay.

Okay.

Get away from me!

I hate my life.

Oh, come on.

Ow!

“Declaration of War.

“When in the course of human events “one person steals”another person’s bedroom, “there is no other choice but war.

“You have 24 hours to give me back what is mine “or face the consequences. “Secret Warrior.

Nice handwriting.

It’s not bad.

It’s just.

You know, it’s an adjustment, so.

Yeah.

Who are you talking to?

What?

It’s Jerry.

I’m just.

I’m on the phone.

No, I would love to.

I would love to, but I can’t.

I’m sort of stuck here.

Yeah.

Hi, Jerry.

It’s Sally.

Hey!

He’s not stuck.

What are you doing?

Yeah, I’ll bring him over on my way to work.

See you soon.

Bye, Jerry.

So, now you’re setting me up on playdates?

Gonna pack me a lunch, maybe put a note in it?

You want a note?

You might not like what it says.

I’ll see him another time.

I’m not up to it.

You haven’t seen Jerry in ages.

Now you live close.

It’ll be nice.

I can’t, I don’t want to, and I’ve got stuff to do.

I have to take care of the light switch in my room now, ‘cause Artie put it in backwards.

You did.

Eat up.

We leave in 15 minutes.

Yes, Mom.

How’s it going, Grandpa?

Sleep okay?

Like a log, Petey.

Thanks.

Don’t you guys get the paper around here?

Yeah, we do.