4بخش

It’s okay, buddy.

Oh.

You see, dear?

I was right.

The boy’s coming around.

Do you both promise to use your words?

I promise.

Why are we doing it this way?

Because, when you have peace talks, you need someone neutral to mediate.

Otherwise, it just breaks down into yelling.

This is dumb!

Well, we’re doing it.

Besides, it took me five minutes to get in this chair, and I’m not getting out.

Grandpa promised.

You have to promise.

Okay, fine.

I promise.

Good.

Now, I will admit that hostilities may have escalated more than either of us anticipated.

You don’t touch another man’s computer!

That’s not cool!

That’s what war is all about, kiddo.

War.

I just want my room back!

No yelling.

I’m not yelling.

He’s yelling.

Say you’re sorry to Grandpa.

No, it’s okay, sweetheart.

I love you, Grandpa.

I love you, too.

Stop that!

Stop what?

What’s going on here?

Nothing’s going on here.

You’re supposed to be neutral!

I don’t even know what that means.

It means you shouldn’t act like you like him better than me.

I do like him better than you.

He gave me a cookie.

Okay, that sounds worse than it is.

It is true a cookie was given, but it was way before this negotiation had even been scheduled.

Chocolate chip, my favorite.

Mine, too.

That’s it.

I’m done.

Peace is canceled.

No yelling.

Shut up!

Shut up’s a bad word.

Peter.

Can I have my second cookie now?

Peter, hold on.

Please.

Come on.

You’re right.

A cookie may have been involved, which may have been an attempt to influence the mediator, which, in retrospect, may have been inappropriate.

May have been?

Okay, to be fair, you entered negotiations with a bit of an attitude yourself.

You didn’t really give peace a chance, either.

Why should I?

You demolished Petersburg.

But that’s what I’ve been trying to tell you when this all started.

War is no game, Peter.

Only kids and fools and generals think that.

War hurts.

War wounds and kills and causes misery.

We got to end this somehow.

How?

What if we have one final competition, winner take all?

What kind of competition?

I don’t know.

You pick.

Whatever you want, I’ll do it and this whole thing will be over.

Whatever I want?

Whatever you want.

Okay.

It’s not a date.

It’s just that we need a fourth for the team and it needs to be a woman, and I don’t know anyone else.

So, let me get this straight.

You want me to help you and your buddies to beat up your grandson and his buddies, because the two of you can’t figure out some way to live in the same house?

Well, when you put it like that.

I’m in.

My granddaughter can be a pain in the butt sometimes.

Whoo!

Holy Mary, we’re dead.

It’s just an intimidation tactic, Danny.

Don’t let them see your fear.

They feed off that.

They’re like baby velociraptors.

Yeah.

We’re up.

Do you guys even remember how to play dodgeball?

Did they even have dodgeball in the 1800s?

They had wiseass kids, I know that.

And just remember, no headsies.

And no nutsies.

No aiming for the junk.

Yeah.

What he said.

Hope you brought your Poligrip, old man, ‘cause those false teeth are coming out.

Big words for a little baby.

Sure you don’t need your diaper changed?

Sure you don’t?

Ooh!

Men.

Tell me about it.

You’re gonna love the attic, Grandpa.

We’re gonna see about that, Petey boy.

Let’s get it on.

Let’s get it on!

Hi.

Run for your lives!

Fire!

I’m already regretting agreeing to do this.

Man down.

Hey!

We said no headsies.

Oops.

It slipped.

Punk.

That’s game!

Age Appropriate Team, one.

Whoo!

Yeah!

That’s what’s up!

AARP Team, none.

My ears are ringing.

This is barbaric.

Man up, Danny.

Get in the game.

Who’s this again?

Come on, bring it in, guys.

Bring it in.

Obviously, they’re way too fast for us.

Yeah.

Yeah.

We’re gonna have to play our game if we’re gonna win this thing.

Am I right?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah.

Okay.

I have an idea.

Game two.

Positions, people.

Grab ‘em!

Fire!

Yeah.

Now you’re in trouble.

Boom!

Out, out, out.

Two catches and a hit.

You three.

Come on, you old coots, give me your best shot.

Well, if it isn’t Mr. Headsies.

Whoo!

Whoo!

Nutsies.

Oops.

Slipped.

That’s game two.

We tied, one apiece.

Final match.

Winner takes all.

You okay?

Okay?

Positions, people.

What’s he doing?

Danny.

You’re an animal.

Hells yeah!

Whose house is this?

Our house!

Our house!

Yeah!

Let’s do this.

Jerry, what happened?

I tore something.

Yeah, I definitely heard a pop.

Dude.

I mean, old dude.

Are you okay?

Of course he’s okay, dummy.

You, you’re out.

Cheap.

You can’t get me.

I’m on fire!

Sorry, Danny.

Oh!

What’s up, son?

You two, out.

What?

That’s not fair!

Yeah, ref, doesn’t count.

Kid was already out and he throws like a girl.

Ooh!

Diane, what’s with the friendly fire?

What are you, a rogue agent now?

You three, out.

Yes!

Nice.

Sorry, Peter’s grandpa, but I’m gonna end you.

Hey, what happened to the sisterhood?

Sorry, kid.

You will not have died in vain.

This is so dumb.

Yeah, you’re out now.

Off you go.

Come on, Peter, you got this!

End him.

Get your room back.

Finish him, Ed.

What are y’all waiting for?

End it!

I got an 8-year-old’s birthday party that’s next.

It’s a tie.

What?

Come on.

No way!

What?

No way!

What?

A tie?

I totally caught his ball before he caught mine.

No, I caught the ball first.

Really?

Seriously, he caught it before him.

He bobbled his.

I didn’t bobble anything.

He’s got butterfingers.

See?

Butter.

He’s old.

His fingers don’t work.

I got one finger that works.

Okay, that’s enough.

Game over.

Go home, all y’all, seriously.

Leave.

I won.

Yeah, sure.

I won.

Are you kidding me?

You lost.

I’m sorry.

What are you talking about?

You know that.

What are you talking about?

I obviously caught it before you.

This place have a bar?

Hmm.

What’s this?

I’m just doodling.

It doesn’t look like one of your usual what do you call ‘em, boxes.

Yeah.

No, don’t get me wrong.

I meant.

It’s interesting, really.

I like it.

Is this for work?

No, the.

The city’s taking bids for an addition to the library.

So I thought I would submit a design.

But you know how it is.

I’m sure they’ll just pick one of the big firms.

Well, you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.

You know who said that?

Uh.

No.

Wayne Gretzky.

Best hockey player of all time.

I was gonna say that.

The Great One?

The greatest.

Still not a sports guy.

Nah.

Okay.

Found him.

Prepare a sedative.

Just lay down, sir.

What is this?

Relax, sir.

Hold him.

Hold him.

We’re trying to save your life, sir.

Get that thing away from me!

Sir, you are not helping us.

I just bought these, you idiot!

What are you.

Don’t worry, sir.

You’re in good hands.

You touch me with those, you die!

Patient appears combative.

You touch me with those.

We might need restraints.

Restraints!

I don’t need restraints!

Just relax, sir.

Don’t do it!

Dude, I hated that test.

I think I did pretty good.

Get in the car.

Uh.

Thanks, but I think I’m just gonna take the bus home with my friends.

Come on, get in the car.

Bye.

Friend of yours?

That’s Chuck.

You don’t need to know about Chuck.

Um.

Where are we going?

Clear Lake.

Nice place.

You’ll like it.

You know I’m only 12, right?

That’s a lot of life left to live.

I could be president someday.

Be on the first manned mission to Mars.

Holy heck!

Get out.

You know.

Mom’s expecting us for dinner.

Maybe I should call her, let her know where we’re at.

Don’t bother.

We’re bringing dinner home tonight.

I rented it for a couple hours.

I thought me and you could do a little fishing.

Together.

How’s that sound?

Great!

I mean, I’m not gonna have fun.

You’ll have fun.

I think I caught one.

That a way.

It’s got to be a big one.

Hey!

He’s huge!

Nice going.

Yeah.

That’s not a fish.

That’s a whale.

He really fought, too.

We’re gonna have some good eating tonight.

Let me bait you up again.

Okay.

Okay, cast away.

Nice cast.

Thanks.

This is kind of fun.

Yeah, it is.

That’s what happens when we put our differences aside, you see?

How are they biting?

Pretty good.

Caught a couple of nice ones.

Good for you.

That’s probably because not too many people fish here, it being illegal and all.

What?

What?

You could ask the ranger.

Here he comes now.

Dump the fish.

But those are our fish!

Dump the fish!

Why?

Dump them!

The cooler!

Forget the cooler.

You are in violation of the law!

He’s gaining on us.

He’s gaining on us.

What are you doing?

I got to call Chuck to pick us up.

He left us?

What kind of friend is that?

Friend?

He’s my Lyft driver.

I don’t know the guy.

Pull over or face the consequences!

Brace yourself.

We’re coming in hot.