5بخش

Freeze!

The following sequence contains scenes that are so intense, horrific, and violent And expensive.

that we can only show it using a technology known as.

Flip-O-Rama!

Take it away, Harold.

HAROLD: Okay, first Professor Poopypants gave Captain Underpants the boot.

GEORGE: Foot!

Foot!

Ow!

HAROLD: Then he made an Underpants sandwich.

GEORGE: Punch, punch!

Punch, punch!

HAROLD: And then, they played a friendly game of paddleball!

Oh, no!

Darn.

Okay, what’s next?

Oh, yes!

Then, Poopypants summoned an army of dolphins.

GEORGE: Wait, what?

Why are you always sneaking dolphins into the movie?

HAROLD: What do you have against dolphins anyway?

GEORGE: I don’t have nothing against dolphins, it just didn’t happen!

HAROLD: Well, so what?

We get to say what happened.

It’s the Flip-O-Rama.

I like dolphins.

The dolphins are in.

GEORGE: Fine, all right.

Let’s just keep going.

HAROLD: You sure?

GEORGE: Yep, positive.

HAROLD: Thank you.

Anyway, Poopypants didn’t realize it.

GEORGE: Quiet five, quiet five but George and Harold’s plan was working out perfectly.

So, they shot themselves to the top of the Turbo Toilet 2000!

To keep things dramatic, they didn’t quite make it.

And then.

And then.

And then.

What happened to the Flip-O-Rama?

I ran outta paper.

Hey, Melvin!

Take that thing off your head.

We gotta stop Poopypants!

Professor Poopypants!

George and Harold are trying to stop you!

You are just so annoying!

So, you two little numbskulls thought you could distract me with this idiotic, naked man.

Am I right?

I’m not naked!

Any final words before this whole revenge thing goes down?

Yeah, wait, wait.

Listen.

We apologize for making fun of your name.

I mean, that was just wrong.

Yeah, we’re sorry.

The truth is, Professor P.you have probably, like, the greatest name we’ve ever heard.

I mean, George, imagine if we had names like that.

Oh, that would be so cool!

Okay, wait, let’s do it.

Let’s try it.

Oh, I would be Fluffy Toiletnose.

Yeah!

I would be Sir Cheeseball Wafflefanny.

Yeah, sure.

You’re a knight.

This is so good!

I wanna change mine.

I’d be Buttcheeks von Stinkelsberg.

Stinkelsberg.

Yeah, those are all really silly names, but there’s nothing funny about Professor Pee-Pee Diarrheastein Poopypants Esquire!

Sir, are you saying your full name is Pee-Pee Diarrheastein Poopypants Esquire?

Uh-huh.

Stop it!

Stop laughing!

Come on!

Listen, your problem isn’t that people laugh at you.

Your problem is that you can’t laugh at yourself.

Oh, really, Oprah?

Is that my problem?

Well, your problem is this.

BOTH: No!

Oh, I hope you enjoyed your years of laughter and merriment because they’re about to come to an end.

Do you find anything funny about me now?

You mean, other than your name?

Yes!

Other than that!

And your hair?

What?

My hair’s cool, I thought.

Are you kidding me?

That’s almost as funny as my hair back in kindygarten!

Remember that afro?

No!

No, this can’t be happening!

Computer, activate brain scan.

Let’s see.

The frontal lobes look big and healthy.

The Hahaguffawchuckleamalus looks all shrimpy, so, what gives?

It can’t be!

Their Hahaguffawchuckleamaluses, they’re enormous!

I need more power.

Anything strike you as funny now?

I’m sure we can think of something!

George, I can’t smile anymore.

No!

Harold!

One down, und one to go.

Harold.

Harold.

Harold, can you hear me?

Harold!

George!

George, is that you?

Right here, buddy.

What’s happening?

We’re shrinking!

Now, if we don’t laugh at something soon, we may never laugh again.

Oh, no!

What do we do?

What do we do?

What do we do?

Well, we have to think of something funny, okay?

Okay, yeah, sure.

Something funny.

Anything?

No, I got nothing.

Me neither.

More shrinkage!

Okay, okay.

What did we use to find funny?

Mostly potty humor.

Poop, vomit, that kind of thing.

Really?

Ugh.

That is, like, the lowest form of comedy.

Don’t you say that, Harold!

Don’t you leave me!

PROFESSOR POOPYPANTS: Attention everyone!

Poopypants here with a little update on the Poopageddon.

Due to the success of my plan thus far.

I’ve decided to wipe out laughter on the entire planet.

After that, you know, I’ll probably move on to other planets.

Jupiter, Mars. can’t forget Uranus!

Wait.

Did he just say.

Your anus.

I know!

Uranus!

Yeah, and once I’m through with the gas giants.

I figure I’ll go after the other galaxies.

What?

GEORGE: It feels so good to laugh!

No, stop it!

Stop laughing!

You’re ruining everything!

Yikes!

Extra credit or survival?

Extra credit or survival?

I choose survival!

Uh-oh!

Oh, yeah!

Wow!

No, how could this be happening?

Never underestimate the power of laughter, Poopypants!

Oh, that’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.

Oh!

Ah!

Whoa!

Harold!

Harold, we did it!

Harold?

I think I bruised a rib.

Because I’ve never laughed so hard in my life!

Oh, we’ll see who’s laughing once I shrink you down.

where you will live in my pocket forever.

amongst my cherry-flavored lip balm.

my butterscotch-flavored lip balm.

Oh, neato!

my mint-flavored

lip balm my extra-moisturized SPF lip balm and all of my lip balms!

Why does one person have so much lip balm?

Help!

Help!

Please, anyone!

Help!

GEORGE: Help!

Ooh, I hope you can find tiny enough pens to make your small, little comic books with.

‘cause you’re about to get smallified!

Tra-la-laa!

I feel.

awesome!

No way!

He has real superpowers!

Oh, that is an obvious twist that I did not see coming despite my many years of comic book studies!

I have come to save the day!

KIDS: Yay!

Yeah, and I’ve come to ruin it!

So back off, buddy!

Ha-ha!

Ew, that’s gross!

Oh, there’s more where that came from.

Monday!

Tuesday!

Wednesday!

Thursday!

Ha-ha!

Unlimited underpants!

I am so glad that we gave him that superpower!

My Sizerator!

Well, it’s mine now!

Alas!

The final failure for Professor Poopypants.

Hmm.

What does this button do?

Oh.

Well, hello down there!

BOTH: No!

Must be holding it backwards.

Yup.

That was it.

Wow.

He is super dumb.

I can’t reach.

Time to take you down once and for all, Poopypants!

Buzz off!

GEORGE: Captain Underpants!

Fly over here so we can make you big again!

Crackerjack idea.

George, just don’t.

No!

PROFESSOR POOPYPANTS: Ha-ha!

Give him a big hand for that one, everybody!

Get him.

Whoops.

Look what I’ve got.

A tiny school filled with tiny children.

and their tiny teachers whose tiny salaries reflect their size and also the value society puts on education.

I’ll take that!

Oh!

Then I’ll take that!

Ow!

Did you just slap me?

Yes, I did.

And you deserved it.

No, I didn’t!

Your hand is huge!

That hurt a lot!

Give it back, it’s mine!

No!

Hands off!

No fair!

No backsies!

Give it to me!

Would you just give me that?

Now look what you’ve done!

Give it!

George!

Gotcha!

Yeah, that’s more like it!

Nice work, sidekicks!

I’ll just put this back down right here.

No, no, no!

Captain Underpants.

There we go.

Back to normal.

like it never happened.

Oh, no, where’d he go?

You’ll never catch me!

You can’t stop Professor Poopypants!

Get back here!

I can’t reach!

HAROLD: Get him, Captain Underpants!

A bee!

Get away from me!

PROFESSOR POOPYPANTS: I’m free!

What?

What the.

Why would you do that?

You just let the bad guy get away!

Come on, guys.

Pretty sure the bee wasn’t the bad guy.

What the heck happened here?

CAPTAIN UNDERPANTS: You’re welcome, peace keeper!

Would you keep it down?

Did not see that coming!

Take that, Doctor Diaper!

I can’t believe we made him.

And he’s even dumber in real life.

Oh!

Look!

Little dolphins!

We have to get rid of him, don’t we?

I think we do.

I mean, he’s a way bigger problem than Mr. Krupp ever was.

But, you know, George bringing back Krupp permanently.

we’ll never be in the same class again.

Yeah, I know.

But just ‘cause we’re in separate classes, doesn’t mean we can’t be friends.

Well, yeah.

I mean, we’ll always be friends.

Right?

Yeah.

Hey, in fact, you know what?

Let’s do a blood oath.

But minus the blood.

I don’t wanna see the blood.

No blood.

Pinky swear?

No, that’s lame.

Mmm-mmm.

Oh, got it!

Oh, no.

What?

No!

That’s not sanitary.

Can’t we just do a verbal declaration of friendship or something?

Oh.

Okay.

Yeah, wow.

I haven’t really prepared anything, but.

I, Harold.

hereby declare George as my best friend, permanently, forever.

And I, George, accept the permanent rights that Harold has given me to be his best friend forever.

and the constitution of friends.

America, friendship.

And the United States of America.

Land and the United States.

Good, okay, yeah.

It’s done.

All right, cool.

Phew.

What a relief.

Yeah, no kidding.

I mean, why were we even worried about that whole classroom thing in the first place?

You know, I don’t know.

We were younger then.

Clearly, we have grown.

Clearly, we have.

Chums!

Thank you for chronicling my surprisingly grounded biography.

The truth is a slippery thing.

And you nailed it.

Now it is time to fly again!

Farewell, my dear sidekicks.

Goodbye, Captain Underpants.

Goodbye.

George!

Harold!

What am I doing in your tree house again?

You boys are in big trouble!

I don’t know how big yet.

Why does this keep happening?

Where are my clothes?

Where are they?

I don’t get it.

Why is Krupp so angry and Captain Underpants so happy?

Maybe it’s because Captain Underpants had us.

You know, he had friends.

We could fix that.

Yeah, you know, we could So that’s how we came to pull the rarest prank of all.

The prank or good.

Huh?

“Do you want to go a date?”

A date?

“Love, Edith.”

“Principal Krupp.”

Oh!

Benjamin Krupp, you sly dog.