بخش 05

Where, exactly, are you thinking about putting that?

Please, just try to hold still.

No offense, little miss, but I think that we need to travel into the city where there are sophisticated doctors who could handle a special case such as myself.

You’re not traveling anywhere, babe.

Well, then I guess I’ll just die.

All you’ve got is a mild back sprain.

There’s no need to be melodramatic about it.

With a little rest and some ice, you’ll be good as new.

Did you tell your grandparents about those men who chased you?

Grandpa’s a little bit deaf.

And tomorrow’s the big day at the county fair, so they have to be up really early.

What do you mean you were chased?

What men are you talking about?

That’s it?

You had all afternoon.

That’s all you could get?

You’re no better than Iris.

These things take time, Norman.

Plus, we ran into a little trouble.

What are you talking about?

One of the local hillbilly children saw me at the general store.

Gustav chased him, but he escaped.

That’s not “trouble”.

“Trouble” is not getting all the deeds signed over to me.

“Trouble” is the biggest deal of my lifetime falling apart.

“Trouble” is not some brat seeing your hocus pocus.

Why do you even want that pitiful farm land anyway?

You don’t even like the country.

I don’t need to like it.

I just need to own it.

It’s part of the bigger picture, where I’m filthy rich.

You’re already rich.

And you’re certainly filthy.

I’m afraid you’re going to have to show me this bigger picture, Norman, if I’m going to come up with a way to help you.

Well?

Fine!

Over here, Bob.

Stop calling me that.

This is the bigger picture the biggest picture the world has ever seen!

A mall?

Yes.

It looks like a factory.

Exactly.

Exactly!

It’s a mall and a factory.

It’s the world’s first and only fully automated shopping experience.

This is bunyanworld.

Named after Paul bunyan, the most marketable icon this state has ever produced.

Imagine, Bob, thousands of cars on an assembly line.

Bunyan.

Bunyanworld.

Bunyanworld.

Bunyanworld.

Bunyanworld.

Bunyanworld.

Bunyanworld.

No more wishy-washy nincompoops

who can’t decide what to buy.

I decide for them.

Ha ha!

All the machines will be computerized.

No more whiney employees.

Every ounce of profit will be mine.

If they can’t pay, I’ll give them credit.

Delicious, irresistable, easy credit.

They’ll all be indebted to me.

I’ll own them.

Ha ha!

Well?

As much as it shocks me to say so,

Norman, it appears we aren’t so different.

What you want to do is put people in a trance, do you not?

You rely on expensive gadgetry, of course, while I employ my priceless natural talents.

But still, it’s hypnosis.

Partners?

Excellent.

Now, how do we speed this ingenious project along?

That’s what this is all about, Bob.

Delbert county sits in the middle of all my property.

Look, look.

I can’t build my dream unless I have all the land.

And these people, these nincompoops are standing in my way.

We’ve got to speed things up.

Is there any way you could hypnotize all of them at once?

Of course.

It’s just a small matter of gathering the, what is it you called them, the nincompoops into one place.

You only came back to walk Travis home?

That’s right.

Well, why did you leave in the first place?

I was a young man when I found the tree stump leading to your world.

I like to explore, and there was so much going on here, so much excitement.

Everyone was going west, building the country.

Babe and I got swept up in the pioneer spirit.

My size was an asset, babe’s too.

We could do more than the average man and ox, so people admired and looked up to us.

And felt good to be appreciated so we stayed around.

Then things changed.

Machines came.

Big automated lumber mills, chain saws, trees started falling faster than ever.

And soon entire forests were being wiped out before our eyes.

I started planting two trees to replace every one that fell.

That’s how I was raised.

But lots of folks didn’t like that idea.

They thought I was standing in the way in progress.

They seemed different.

They seemed greedy.

Then it wasn’t about the adventure anymore.

And soon I found my heart just wasn’t in it.

I decided to take my axe and go home.

The sad thing is that i don’t think people even noticed we were gone.

That’s not true.

Don’t forget all of the statues.

I’m telling you they’re everywhere from Maine to Minnesota.

And we learned about you in school.

Really?

What did you learn about us in school?

We learned that you ate a lot of pancakes, and created the great lakes, and the Grand Canyon.

What?

That’s ridiculous.

Don’t lie, now.

You always have liked the pancakes, pb.

No, I mean the other stuff.

How can they teach you that in school?

That’s nonsense.

Well, obviously, great lakes in the Grand Canyon were created millions of years ago through erosion and the shifting of tectonic plates.

I’ve know that since kindergarten.

But there are all these stories called tall tales, and you’re definitely the tallest.

I’m a tall tale, huh?

How am I going to do it?

How am I ever going to get everyone assembled in one place?

Think, norm, think.

In local news developer norm blandsford is causing quite a stir.

They’re talking about me.

Turn it up.

With his attempts buy all the property in delbert county for an as yet undisclosed reason, blandsford has aroused suspicions, and, in one case, a protest.

What?

They’re giving airtime to that crazy blue hair?

You’ve got to be kidding me.

Can you believe this?

Norm blandsford won’t tell anyone what he intends to build on all this land.

Why is that?

And I don’t trust him one bit.

We’re going to have to move quickly.

In other news, the prizes for the largest produce and finest livestock will be awarded tomorrow, the final day of the delbert county fair.

These nincompoops and their stupid fair make me want to puke.

Goodnight Travis, Whitney.

Thanks for your hospitality.

Sure, no problem.

See you in the morning.

Wha, what is that?

What are you talking about?

You can’t hear that?

It’s making my teeth vibrate.

Whoa!

Whoah-ho!

Babe?

What’s gotten into you?

Whoah!

What was that about?

It was just an airplane.

An air plane?

You mean people can fly now, too?

Actually, a lot of lights you see in the sky aren’t stars.

They’re planes.

So many changes.

I think we’re going to have to say goodbye to you kids now.

We’re heading out at daybreak, babe.

Why do you have to go so early?

What’s the matter?

I suppose you can say I’m a little.

“Freaked out”.

Oh, for crying out loud.

Are you kidding me?

This is like trying to sleep in a lumber mill with all that snoring.

Ah.

Pretty lights.

Wow.